40 წლის დროშა – 14 წლის დროშიან სახელმწიფოში

კლიშეა, მაგრამ წერა ტაქსის ეპიზოდით უნდა დავიწყო. 10 მაისს, ტაქსიში ნახევრად მოკალათებულს, მძღოლმა უცებ მაღაზია ,,ქალთა ბედნიერების” ვიტრინისათვის მიმაქცევინა ყურადღება – ეს ქოლგები აქაც დაულაგებიათო, მეუბნება. რა ქოლგები-მეთქი. LGBT-ქოლგებიო. გავიხედე და ვიტრინაში ცისარტყელას ფერებიანი ქოლგები დავინახე. ჩემდა უნებურად, ორ რამეზე გავიფიქრე: ,,ქალთა ბედნიერებაში” გეი-დროშით დაფარული ქოლგების გაყიდვა როგორი მარკეტინგული სვლაა-მეთქი; და ოღონდ ახლა მძღოლმა LGBT-თემის ლანძღვა არ დაიწყოს-მეთქი; თორემ სხვა გამოსავალი არ მექნებოდა – ან კონფორმული უნდა გავმხდარიყავი, ან კონფლიქტური. არადა, ცხოვრება ხომ არ არის ასეთი შავ-თეთრი – გაცილებით მრავალფეროვანია… როგორც ცისარტყელა.

აქ უკვე ჩემს თავზე გამეცინა და მძღოლს ვუთხარი, იქნებ გათიშული სატელევიზიო არხის ფერებშია ეს ქოლგები-მეთქი. თუმცა, ცხოვრება მართლაც მრავალფეროვანია: სანამ ჩვენ ტერმინ LGBT-ს ათვისებას ვცდილობთ, აბრევიატურა დამატებითი ასოებით მდიდრდება (მაგალითად, Q-თი და I-თი). არ ვიცი, რამდენად სექსუალური ან ცისარტყელასავით რომანტიკულია სახელის დარქმევა სექსუალური იდენტობის ყველა გამოვლინებისთვის, მაგრამ როგორც ყველაფერი ამქვეყნად,  დასაწყისში ეს ამბებიც რომანტიკული იყო და, ცხადია, სწორედ ბრძოლის ფასად გახდა შესაძლებელი ის, რომ – სხვა თუ არაფერი – ამ ერთ დროს სუბკულტურული თემის გეი დროშა დღეს პოპ-კულტურის ისეთივე ნაწილია, როგორიც მარიხუანას ფოთლებიანი ჩინური სუვენირი, ჩე გევარას მაისური ან ბობ მარლის გამოსახულებიანი სანთებელა.

ცისარტყელა დროშა – ლესბოსელი, გეი, ბისექსუალი და ტრანსგენდერი ადამიანების სიამაყის სიმბოლო. წყარო

არც არის გასაკვირი, ასე რომ მოხდა: ბოლო-ბოლო, ამ დროშის ისტორია დაახლოებით 40 წელს ითვლის და, ამდენად, ბევრად ტრადიციულია, ვიდრე საქართველოს სახელმწიფო დროშა. მისი შექმნა ისტორიულ ფიგურასთან, ჰარვი მილკთან, არის დაკავშირებული, რომელიც მოგვიანებით გას ვან სენტის 2008 წლის ცნობილ ფილმში “მილკი” შონ პენის გმირმა გახადა პოპულარული. მან ღიად გეისა და არტისტს, გილბერტ ბეიკერს გეი თემის სიმბოლოს გამოგონება შესთავაზა. სწორედ ასე აფრიალდა პირველად, 1978 წლის 25 ივნისს, ცისარტყელას გამოსახულებიანი დროშა სან-ფრანცისკოს გეი აღლუმზე.

მარცხნივ: ჰარვი მილკი; მარჯვნივ: შონ პენი. წყარო

ლეგენდის თანახმად, ბეიკერის შთაგონების წყარო ან გეი თემისთვის ერთ-ერთი პირველი საკულტო ქალის, ჯუდი გარლანდის ნამღერი Somewhere over the Rainbow იყო, ან – რასაც უფრო სარწმუნოდ მიიჩნევენ – 1960-იანების კოლეჯის კამპუსებში ჩამოკიდებული ე.წ. რასების დროშა, ხუთი ჰორიზონტალური ზოლით, რომელსაც ჰიპების მოძრაობა მსოფლიო მშვიდობის ნიშნად იყენებდა. თავიდან, ბეიკერის დროშას რვა ფერი ჰქონდა. ყველა ფერი რაღაცას აღნიშნავდა (წითელი, მაგალითად, სიცოცხლეს, ვარდისფერი – სექსს), შემდეგ შვიდი ფერი დარჩა (სათანადო ვარდისფერ ქსოვილს ბეიკერი ვერ შოულობდა) და ბოლოს – ექვსი. დღეს, ფერების ეს კომბინაცია იმდენად პოპულარულია, რომ თბილისის საცობებში გაჭედილი ტაქსის მძღოლებიც კი უმალ ამჩნევენ მაღაზიების ვიტრინებში.

გეი აღლუმი, სან ფრანცისკო, 1978 წ. წყარო

ამავე ლოგიკით, როგორც იატაქვეშეთიდან მეინსტრიმში გადასულ მოვლენებს სჩვევიათ, დროშა ცოტათი გახუნდა და LGBT-მოძრაობამაც დაკარგა თავდაპირველი რომანტიკა – მას დაახლოებით იგივე დაემართა, რაც ბურჟუებად ქცეულ ჰიპებს, მით უფრო, იმ უგლუტენო და პოლიტკორექტულ დიეტაზე დამჯდარ თავისუფალ სამყაროში, სადაც ელიან, რომ ყოველი მომდევნო ჯეიმს ბონდი გეი იქნება, ყოველი მომდევნო ამერიკის პრეზიდენტი – ქალი (ხოლო მისი მომდევნო – გეი) და სადაც ეს წესრიგი დამაბნევლად ირღვევა: ხან ტრამპი ხდება პრეზიდენტი, ხან ფემინისტურ მოძრაობასთან ასოცირებული მადონა – ჰილარი კლინტონის გამარჯვების შემთხვევაში – ამერიკას უფასო ორალურ სექსს ჰპირდება; თავისუფალ სამყაროში, სადაც ჟურნალისტიკა უღიმღამო ევფემიზმების ხროვად იქცა; სადაც მორალის პოლიციელები კონფორმულობას გაიძულებენ: თუ ბრექსიტი თავისუფალი სამყაროს აღსასრული არ გგონია, გადარეული ნაციონალისტი ხარ; თუ გეი ქორწინებას უპირობოდ არ ემხრობი – ჰომოფობი; თუ ბაღდადის ტერაქტის დროს სოციალურ ქსელში სოლიდარობის გამომხატველ სურათს არ აყენებ (და აყენებ პარიზის ტერაქტის დროს) – ფარისეველი სნობი. არადა, სამყარო ხომ მართლა გაცილებით მრავალფეროვანია…

ჩვენს ლოკალურ სამყაროში, სადაც ტერმინ LGBT-ს ათვისება ეს-ესაა, დავიწყეთ და სადაც ახალი სახელმწიფო დროშა სულ რაღაც 14 წელს ითვლის, სულ სხვაგვარ მორალის პოლიციასა თუ დაბნეულობებს აქვს ადგილი. მსუბუქი, თუმცა მრავლისთქმელი მაგალითი რომ მოვიტანოთ, ჩვენი თვით-გამოცხადებული რაინდი დაუფარავი ჰომოფობია მაშინ, როდესაც 1998 წელს, დიდ ბრიტანეთში, დედოფალმა ელისაბედ II-მ რაინდობის წოდება ერთ-ერთ ყველაზე წარმატებულ მუსიკოსსა და დღეს უკვე ყველაზე ცნობილ გეი-მშობელს, ელტონ ჯონს მიანიჭა.

არ ვიცი, რამდენად შემთხვევითია, მაგრამ 2013 წლის 17 მაისს სწორედ დიდ ბრიტანეთში ვიყავი – სამეფოში, სადაც  ერთმანეთს ყველაზე უნიკალურად ერწყმის ტრადიციები და სიახლეები.

2013 წლის 17 მაისი, თბილისი. წყარო

სწორედ ის 17 მაისი მაქვს მხედველობაში, ჰომოფობიასთან, ტრანსფობიასა და ბიფობიასთან ბრძოლის საერთაშორისო დღე თბილისში ჰომოფობიაში, ტრანსფობიასა და ბიფობიაში რომ გადაიზარდა. პირველი მსოფლიოს უპირატესობებით დამტკბარი, შერეული ემოციებით, ოდნავ დისტანცირებული ვაკვირდებოდი სამშობლოში მიმდინარე მოვლენებს და მაშინ, როცა ჩემი მეგობარი სამღვდელო პირის მიერ ნასროლი ყბადაღებული ,,ტაბურეტკისგან” ცდილობდა თავის დაღწევას, მე Starbucks-ში ვიჯექი და მემარჯვენე შავკანიან ბიჭთან ერთად კაპიტალიზმის სიკეთეებს განვიხილავდი მეორე ამერიკანოს თანხლებით.

თუმცა, ამ მძვინვარე ჰომოფობიური კოშმარისგან დისტანცირება რთული იყო, მით უმეტეს, რომ ბრიტანეთში ჩემი ყოფნის მთავარი მიზეზი სამეცნიერო ფორუმში მონაწილეობა იყო, რომელიც ერთ-ერთი უნივერსიტეტის კვლევითი ინსტიტუტის – რუსეთის, ცენტრალური და აღმოსავლეთ ევროპის კვლევების ცენტრის – მიერ იყო ორგანიზებული, მოკლედ, იმ კვლევითი ცენტრის მიერ, პოსტ-საბჭოთა და პოსტ-სოციალისტური სახელმწიფოები, ახალი დემოკრატიები, ტრანზიტულ ფაზაში მყოფი ქვეყნები და მათი იდენტობის საკითხები რომ აინტერესებს – ერთი სიტყვით, ყველა ის უბედურება, რაც თანამედროვე სოციალური მეცნიერებისათვის საქართველოსაც მიმზიდველს ხდის და რაშიც, ალბათ, ფულიც კეთდება.

შესაბამისად, ფორუმის მანძილზე, უნივერსიტეტის არაერთი შთამბეჭდავი შენობის სხვადასხვა აუდიტორიასა თუ საკონფერენციო დარბაზში საკმაოდ ჭრელი, თუმცა პოსტ-სოციალისტური ტრავმებითა და სევდით გაერთიანებული სხვადასხვა ასაკის ხალხი იყრიდა თავს და კიდევ – ის ცნობისმოყვარე და არატრავმირებული ადამიანები, ვისაც პლანეტის საკმაოდ ნატანჯი რეგიონი, ცენტრალური და აღმოსავლეთ ევროპა აინტერესებს.

მაგრამ პოსტ-საბჭოთა ქვეყნებში ჩატარებულ კვლევებს კიდევ ერთი აშკარა თავისებურება ახასიათებს. ეს საქართველოშიც მიგრძვნია, საქართველოზე ჩატარებული საზოგადოებრივი აზრის კვლევების პრეზენტაციის დროს, და არა-საქართველოშიც. ვგულისხმობ იმას, რომ, როგორც წესი, ასეთ კვლევას რაიმე ყოვლად სასოწარკვეთილი შედეგი მოაქვს ხოლმე – დემოკრატიის თვალსაზრისით. მაგალითად, ის, რომ გამოკითხულ ქართველთა უმეტესობა საკუთარი თავის იდენტიფიცირებას ჭეშმარიტ მართლმადიდებელთან უფრო ახდენს, ვიდრე საქართველოს მოქალაქესთან; ან ის, რომ გამოკითხულთა უმრავლესობა წინააღმდეგია, მეზობლად გეი ჰყავდეს და ბევრად ურჩევნია, კრიმინალის გვერდით იცხოვროს. ამას ისიც ემატება, რომ მსგავსი კვლევის შედეგების წარმდგენები და მათი მსმენელები უნებურად თავმომწონენი ხდებიან (რადგან თავად არ წარმოადგენენ ასეთ უმრავლესობას), ხოლო თუ ასეთ მოხსენებებს უცხოელები ესწრებიან, სურათი გაცილებით აბსურდული ხდება: საბოლოო ჯამში, ჩვენ მათ  ვუყვებით, თუ როგორი ჩამორჩენილი ქვეყანა ვართ, ხოლო ამის ფონზე, თავად ჩვენ ამ ქვეყნის გამორჩეულ ნაწილს წარმოვადგენთ.

ჰოდა, სრულიად ადეკვატური იქნებოდა, ჩემს წილ მოხსენებაში (რომელიც ქართველ სტუდენტებში რელიგიური საკითხების კვლევას ეხებოდა) ორი დღით ადრე საქართველოში მომხდარი 17 მაისის ამბები ჩამესვა, მაგრამ სამშობლოც დავინდე და საკუთარი ინტელექტუალური რესურსებიც, აუდიტორიას კი ის სლაიდები ვაკმარე, რომელზეც ბიძინა ივანიშვილი ხატებით გაწყობილი ნაძვის ხის წინ დგას; ან რომელზეც ერთმანეთის გვერდით წერია, რომ ფართომასშტაბიანი კვლევის არც ერთი გამოკითხული არ აფასებს უარყოფითად კათოლიკოს-პატრიარქის აქტივობებს და რომ გამოკითხულთა თითქმის აბსოლუტური უმრავლესობა ევროკავშირსა და ნატოში გაწევრიანების მომხრეა.

სამწუხაროდ, ესეც საკმარისი აღმოჩნდა იმისთვის, რომ ზემოთნახსენები უნებური თავმომწონე პათოსი ჩამრთვოდა. როცა ეს გავაცნობიერე, ეტყობა, შემრცხვა და თვით-ირონიის მოშველიება ვცადე. და როცა მკითხეს, როდიდან ხართ ქართველები ქრისტიანებიო, ვუპასუხე, ქრისტეშობამდე-მეთქი, და მე თვითონ მოვკვდი სიცილით. ჩემი ხუმრობა მამაჩემს რომ მოვუყევი, იმედი გამიცრუა – ეგ ძველი ანეკდოტია და თან, სომხებზეო.

სამშობლოში დაბრუნებულს, 17 მაისის ირგვლივ ატეხილი დისკუსიიდან ლადო ბურდულის შეფასება დამამახსოვრდა – აბა, ერთი მითხარი, რამდენი შენი ნაცნობი გეი იყო ქუჩაში გასულიო (ცოტას ჩამოვთვლა შევძელი), სად იყვნენ ცნობილი გეებიო, უმეტესობა „სტრეიტები“ იყვნენო, ყველამ თავისი გასაპროტესტებელი უნდა გააპროტესტოსო… და მგონი, ჰარვი მილკიც ახსენა დადებით კონტექსტში. გარკვეულწილად,  დავეთანხმე.

მაგრამ რაღაცები ალბათ მაინც იცვლება, ტოლერანტობისკენ.  ასე, მაგალითად, ჩემს ტაქსის მძღოლს სულაც არ დაუწყია LGBT – თემის ლანძღვა. პირიქით – კეთილგანწყობილიც კი მეჩვენა.

ნამდვილად მრავალფეროვანია ცხოვრება. და სექსიც. ფროიდს თუ დავუჯერებთ, სექსუალურ გადახრად მხოლოდ სექსის სრული უქონლობა შეგვიძლია მივიჩნიოთ. სხვა ყველაფერი გემოვნების საკითხიაო. აბრევიატურაში შემავალი ყველა ასოსი არ ვიცი, მაგრამ, ბოლო-ბოლო, ვუდი ალენის თქმის არ იყოს, ბისექსუალობა იმთავითვე აორმაგებს თქვენი შაბათი ღამის შანსებს.

და იმედი მაქვს, ჩვენი დროშა უფრო მოწიფული თინეიჯერი რომ გახდება, კანონით მონიჭებული მრავალფეროვნების უფლება ისეთივე აღსრულებადი იქნება, როგორც ეს ბუნებით არის გარანტირებული.

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